There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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