don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
