Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
We named our party play list daddy issues
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize