What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize
