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• (650): View more from California

  sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.

  (415): View more from California

  we had.

  (650): View more from California

  well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.

  Fav 5 876 1659

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• (541): View more from Oregon

  Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."

  Fav 36 7618 1164

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• (302): View more from Delaware

  dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit

  Fav 13 7062 1515

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.

  Fav 10 1662 3161

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• 

  Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?

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• (239): View more from Florida

  MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.

  Fav 6 1509 2905

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.

  Fav 4 1386 2784

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• (801): View more from Utah

  I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...

  Fav 11 2721 863

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is

  Fav 5 1007 684

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.

  Fav 2 814 558

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• 

  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker

  Fav 6 971 664

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.

  Fav 2 852 494

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.

  Fav 1 350 436

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• (813): View more from Florida

  Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.

  Fav 0 7 40

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