I wish i was in the wii world.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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