these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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