I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
