): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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