I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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