At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
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