as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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