its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ππ#pensacolaproblems
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
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