there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
