She's JV to your varsity
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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