Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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