Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
she looked like the before picture.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Randomize
