you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
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a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
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I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
We're too hungover to prance.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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