So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize