It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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