brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Randomize
