D3 body, D1 cock
1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
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