K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
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