Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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