found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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