those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
