That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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