At least make sure they are 18
Why
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
A bitchslap is in order.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
