if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
