I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I lost the right to judge tonight
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
