He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
