Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
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I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
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If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
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