I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
