You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
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