he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
