she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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