the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Don't EVER smell your tampon
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
