He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
