what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize