when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Randomize
