butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize