who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
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