i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
