They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Pants are for mortals
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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