his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Never underestimate the power of titties
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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