My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
