The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
