well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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