I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
