Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Randomize
