im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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