He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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